Thursday, March 31, 2011

One day until my impending doom...

and what doom is that? I bet you are wondering what could be so awful that I'm dreading it. IIITTTSSSS



my birthday.

I know I know, I sound crazy! But I'm afraid to get older.  I'm turning 19! 19! I've almost been on the planet for TWO decades! It scares me! Soon I'll be 30, 40, 50 and then dead. I have too many things to worry about, and I don't want to have to deal with getting older too.  I half expect to wake up with gray hair tomorrow.


I want to be like Peter Pan and never grow up.  Living in never-never land forever sounds great to me.  hey, maybe I'll become a fairy!

I think I'm just scared to leave my childhood, and my teenager-hood behind.  I feel like I have not accomplished anything that you are supposed to as a teenager, and now I have one year left to go crazy.  but will I make the most of the next 365 days to do all the crazy teenage things I have not done yet? Probably not I'm too scared and shy to do anything crazy. Maybe I'll wait till my roaring twenties to go crazy, who knows.  I just feel behind, and in adequate to be 19,  I'm too much of a child, and not enough of an adult.

We'll see how the next year goes.  Until then, I have 10 and a half hours left of being 18 years old. :/

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